So your counter for why people cant self identify with a gender is that its stupid. Thats an appeal to emotion. You are basically saying you dont like it because its icky. People do tons of things I find gross or dont understand. Thats not an excuse to invalidate it.
You are sidestepping. We are not arguing about what a female is. We are arguing about womanhood and how using the definition of female for woman, along with the concepts of adult and human, are equally as circular.
We do not look at someone's genitalia and chromosomes to determine their gender in day to day life. That isn't a thing. If you are willing to make allowances for "birth defects" and call those people whose identity as woman woman, why is this so hard for trans woman? it really doesn't effect you that much.
Again gender and sex are different things. We don't know the genders of lions, if they have any at all, because we can't talk to them. It's a nonsequitar.
Also you completely ignored how the adult and human parts of your definition are also not great. i guess you didn't have a counter far those? or still processing (which is fine)?